about procrastination

I know i abandon you every once in a while for a long while, but what to say? I have been super busy. As I turned 25, I have been noticing changes in me. I have always been a procastinator, now, not so much so. I still procrastinate on assignments to the best of my ability but I no longer avoid doing other voluntary things related to work. I acually even start preparing for papers a couple of days in advance. Is it age? or is it grad school slowly hammering me into its image? Creating a work ethic where none was before? Or is it just better time management? I feel like I get things done as fast as before and if I start earlier, I should also have more time. Not so, still feel equally rushed and mad. Ofcourse having a crazy TA professor helps. I spend most of my tuesdays and thursdays praying that he wouldnt do something stupid and I wont have to kill him mentally one more time. But that rarely happens. Luckily I am not into voodoo or my tiny office would have been crammed full of effigies stuck with sharp pointy pins.

On another tack, I read a great book of essays about judy blume books. I realized that a lot of people learnt a lot of things from her, including me! I learnt something from these essays too. That I am normal. eh, cmon, stop laughing! Fine I am relatively normal. Other people have strong crazy friendships too and they are devastated when they end! One line struck me as bieng true ” I think a best friend in every way leaves no room in your life for a relationship. For a relationship to happen, some of that closeness must go away” That makes sense and makes choices made by friends a bit easier to bear.

On yet another tack…hmm I change tacks too fast what? I am rereading Wheel of Time series. My books are in India, therefore library copies it is! I am amazed that each line in even the first book is so indicative of things to come. Each line can be interpreted so clearly as being meaningful in retrospect! I assume he had a very clear plan for the entire series from the very beginning, which makes him even more awesome than he already is in my eyes. I have never felt the lose of an author more. RIP Robert Jordan.

On ye another tack. I had a baking disaster. I took this glorious recipe from david lebovitz, and then turned out my springform wasnt water tight and the cake turned into a pudding. I therefore microwaved it some more and served it as the chocolate pudding cake! It worked! However, I did not like it even that muchly! If you plan to visit his site, dont go empty stomached. I have been driven to desserts before and its all his fault 😀

On the last tack, it is time for a workout. You do so too and leave a comment. Am sure it burns a couple calories

Its a qut, siler jubilee or a quarter of a century or just old-ness?

Hello and thanks for the birthday wishes. If you didnt know or forgot, not to worry, I still take late presents 😉

And thanks to everyone who made it a lovely birthday. I had a yum time and bosom friend, I did have chocolate in my day and some vey yumm cheesecake. The cheesecake however was shared amongst many so it was even better! What can be better than people willing to spend time with you on your birthday and sharing food and laughter, specially when it was a monday?

I was truly humbled this time, I was very sure that I will not have a party, due to many reasons such as my roommates not exactly being fond of me or the day I was born. So I had steeled myself for a day spent in avoiding self pity at every turn. I was determined to not be morose on my birthday. I was trying very hard not to start crying, alone in my bedroom just before midnight. Hence I started cleaning my room.( a very unusual move, marked either by a full moon or depression).

 Suddenly I recieve a phone call from a friend and neighbour who has managed to remember the birthday and it turns out to be a surprise party for ME!! I still havent managed to locate the pictures. Since it was a surprise I didnt have my camera on me. I was humbled because all these men in my life managed to organize this, when I was sure they wouldnt be bothered. I was humbled that these people do care enough and do pay attention even when I think they dont know I care so much about birthdays. They were surprised that I wasnt expecting it. I truly didnt anticipate this or the treat for dinner the next day.

 It also proved that I am truly one of the guys. I dont think many girls have five single males celebrate their birthday. Luckily no birthday bumps. It does bring to mind, why do women hate me and why am I single?

Logically speaking, women hate women who are gorgeous, which am not, note the single part. Women hate women who attract more men. I dont know about the attracting, but I do manage to befriend them. So hate is OK. However the single part, maybe should be the cold ice queen and invent some damsel in distress part? How about not talking about computers, or bidis, or daaru or cars. Instead emphasize my cooking skills and my feminine side…awww so cuuute. Hey, me can do that..havent you noticed yet?

Anyways guys, for your love, I promise to bring my love in turn…mm..anybody for some apple walnut bread?

After the birthday, another milestone, my second annivesary of the weight loss saga, I have managed to maintain the aproximately 35 pounds I have lost. This is not a lot, but quite an achievement for me. I have never maintained for so long. Now I am hopefully losing more weight as I get serious about food again..umm..as in about not eating it. So look out women, more reasons to hate moi!

if you thought i was going somewhere with this post, sorry to disappoint you…and toodle o!

technological advancement of excuses

The Right Brain vs Left Brain « That Wealth Advisor-guy

ok this is a multiplex post as usual!

a) watch this and decide which way she spins for you. I was freaked, because I would blink and she would start spinning the other way! does this proove once and for all that I am really really strange? noooo…

b) the main topic of the post: technological advancement of excuses: This monday I had a terrible midterm, long and gruelling. So much so that it caused a post traumatic stress disorder and I am still getting nightmares about it! However, due to the mindterm I thought we wouldnt have any assignments due today and didnt even look to see. As you may guess, I was dumb and pulled a freshman by not looking at the syllabus. Here is where the technological part comes in. I told the professor I forgo my flashdrive at home and will have the assignment to him by the afternoon. I havent done this in a while. The last time I made up something was in school…uh, Maam, I forgot my Homework copy (this was a regular occurance) . Look at the technology advancement. Flashdrives get forgotten instead of notebooks! Fortunately we always an excuse system ready.  Humans can take advantage of any technology they come across, specially for unintended purposes, such as internet pOrn, sp@m and ofcourse as mentioned above, excuses. Do tell moi what you think!

c) I just started my food and workout blogging at multiply..dunno…just felt like it! If you wanna read..go to http://gobledygook.multiply.com/ 

d) I am in technological trouble: my laptop, heartrate monitor and car are giving warning signals that their time is coming..sigh..pray for me friends..pray!

ciao!

randomness

Hi,

A lot of posts have been running through my head, unfortunately, I have had no time to actually write any of them. But today is the day! So here go a lot of random things running through my head.

1. School has been on for a month and it feels like summer never happened, the treadmill, people/hamsters just got even faster and life is crazy!

2. I hate freshmen, I hate the fact that they think it is ok to treat anyone any which way even if they are teaching you. Also I TA for two classes with 250 kids each. The fact that they cant even spell their own name, ruins my happiness, every single day.

3. I am actually getting up in the morning to run. What does that tell you? that if you keep making resolutions for 10 years, someday they might happen, so no giving up on the resolution.

4. While I am on the running topic..let me break this gently, I am not running the kansas city half marathon on my 25th birthday, because of a certain overlooked detail, namely school is going to be a wee bit wild for me to train. So, maybe something in the spring I guess…but no, I am not going to stop running..me likes it 😀

5. I would really really like one whole day of staring at the ceilling and not doing anything. Unfortunately, by evening I am so restless that I take off myself…ugh…

6. Something that is making me very sad today, one of my favorite authors passed away yesterday. Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time series that I have devoured for the past 13 years is no more. He has left out the last part of the 12 part series and has gone to his grave taking the secrets of Mat, Tuon, Rand, Perrin, Moraine and the rest of the bunch with him. May the light bless him and the embrace of the mother welcome him home. His world will be sorely missed by millions of fans around the world, who will also now forver fight over what should have happened next.

I, as an individual have never been so touched by the death of someone I dont even know, I now know what it feels like to lose something I took so much for granted.

7. More cheerfully, I am also back to spinning and McCain, which resulted in me seeing this gorgeous tango perfromance yesterday, I must say, the men are hot and very very my kind of men (wipes drool off keyboard) and the women are amazing! most of all though is the music and tango music is my latest “it” music, along with all my running cheesy music and fusion and classical and dhinchak hindi songs.

8. That s it for now, some comments would be really welcome! be good and enjoy the glorious fall weather!

longish time no see

hello

been busy, been  tired, been lazy been me! hence the absence

Work is good, summer is gorgeous, not too hot, rainy and unfortunately humid at times. Running is good too..about 9 miles long runs right now, feels good and powerful. As I have continued to increase my running mileage every week and as I do my summer job I realize there is so little respect I give to my poor body. These fat legs that I gripe about can run 20 miles a week and do two spinning classes and some kickboxing for a good measure.  I can weed, hoe and rake all day long and run in the evening, the only side effect being a very sleepy and tired me! Ohhh how I need my sleep! Learning to appreciate my body these days and how healthy it is, it may not be skinny, but it sure is fit!

Summer is almost over too…ohh why does summer come to an end! how I pity people who have to work all year long, unlike sudents…hmm unconcious reason for doing a PhD? to have 3 months off every year? whoops then I would never get done

I have no more thoughts..I am blank, and very very sleepy and it is just 9:30. I promise to update more when I am more awake and can actually string a couple of sentences together!

more later

adieu

note to self

hey

the promised updates are in form of pages , so if you want to read the boring details of my food and running, they are filed to your right under pages, called food stories. I decided not to clutter the main page with my food phobias and addictions. I wonder why I am not ready to blend both parts of my life..read..needs meditation…read..i need sleep..more later

Fair warning

hello

Thought I should warn you. I have been on a break and am now back. New and Improved, new and slightly demented. Focused on so any things that some say that I am bound to fail. I need to do so many things to just survive and to keep my brain running smoothly.

So here’s the deal. In the next 6 weeks, I finish my thesis draft. Quite doable, as only superficial changes remain, the main work is done. In the next 6 weeks, I am also going to revamp my eating habits and in the next 16 months I will train for a half marathon. Its quite a lot, you say? Well all of the above should be mutuallt exclusive and I am determined to think only of these three things with equal priorities. I have woken up and am not smelling any roses. The roses need watering to bloom. I told ya I was demented.

Why? Because there has been enough dilly dallying and enough playing around and enough waiting for things to happen. Now things need to happen FAST. The only way is to keep myself busy and just DO IT. The capitals are to convince myself taht I can do it. So whats the plan?

I am an expert plan maker, in school I used to make these beautiful plans, study for 3 hours, take 30 minutes break. The result? 30 minutes studying and about 4 hours of reading something..ahem..more fun!! But things have changed, I generally stick to my plans. And I have decided that stick to my plans I will and I will finish what I have begun, namely all three above.

so for the grace of god go I

 1. Finish my draft: I will make the changes I am asked to make every week and do something extra as well. I will also finish the creation of the online survey as well as do whatever is asked of me..repeat afetr me : grad students have no ego, grad students are vermin crawling on the ground, grad students have achieved zen because they can take it all, chamipions accept pain, changes to thesises and never complain. Repeat as many times as neccesary.

2. Revamp eating habits: I have gotten a bit complacent, eating a little more here and a lot more there and definately unjustly justifying consumption of cheesecakes etc. So i have adopted the “NO CHOICE” plan. This is essentially to plan everything I will eat the next day and stick to it, down to the last breath and in the face of cheesecake and chinese.  Can I do it? I knows not, I think I can, but time will tell. I promise to report to my faithful readers as to whether I stuck to it or not. I will add another page to my blog and report there..please be encouraging..pretty please?

3. Train for a half- marathon : This is probably the easiest thing for me. I am already spinning 3 times a week, all I need is some serious running the otehr three days. Friday is my day of rest. I claim it to be mine 😀 . So I will follow the runner’s world training program and be ready to run a half marathon by July 2007 and a full one by october 2007.  Just a matter of maths and sticking to it. If you want weekly reports you just have to ask!

Why am I putting this on my blog? This is kind of like throing my hat over the proverbial fence. I feel more accountable and I also report to all you guys out there which makes it less easy to make excuses. So will be reporting food everyday and will also be reporting runs weekly and other sundry stuff as life continues. I iwll add another page for the food and runs. All this begins from monday the 26 of march. I am super exited 😀 and I am super scared as well. If I dont do it, I will also have to pay for it by losing face and self esteem. SO heres to a new and improved Directions!

new look

tell me what you think of the new look, I took the header picture myself! It is spliced together…a little spapse but me likes!

busy at the moment..more in a couple of days…stick with it!

bored or just?

Chandni left this tag open and I decided to indulge, not bored but just trying verrry  hard to avoid some work.

So, here by the grace of god go I:

The song you have been humming all afternoon:  nothing..really..no humming today..eeps..but the most played song this week and every week is Billy Joel “I go to extremes” :

” Darling I don’t know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low there ain’t no in-betweens
And if I stand or I fall
It’s all or nothing at all”

The weirdest thing you’ve ever done: This is a very hard tag you know, the weirdest thing would be to actually mistake a cow for an elephant and tell my mom, hey look a baby elephant, and she ofcourse gives me a strange look and says thats a BROWN cow.   Another would be bieng the only sober person and the only girl in a party of 30 guys, all sloshed.

Your very first crush, do you still like them or even remember them –   How would I ever forget, my mom read my dairy so ofcourse I get teased about it even now, and NO I dont like him anymore, he was the creepy guy that I never understood why I liked in the first place.

What do you do and do you find it interesting:  I am in the business of psychology..namely industrial/org. behavior and I am lovin’ it :D..will get paid someday hopefuly if i graduate

Committed or single: Proudly, thankfully and very maddeningly single and quite happy that way except for the occasional senti movie bump in the road.

 Cloud 9 moment: dancing on stage and doing something totally unexpected over which the audience went wild, I can close my eyes and hear the applause.

The weirdest person you came across today: ahh there’s the rub, been avoiding human contact all day.

 How’s your mood: Sunny, with 50% chances of showers and blasts of rains, a little chilly with gusts of warm wind, completely unpredictable.

Last movie you saw: About A boy, sweet flick and Hugh Grant is so hot.

Last book you read: Maskerade , Terry Pratchett, two weeks ago, on plane from London to US, and currently Structural Equation Modelling using AMOS, so goes the semester.

What do you think of yourself: Roller coaster with  many highs and lows , some scratches and cliffhangers garunteed

One word for the person who tagged you: nobody did..but for Chandni: kindered spirit 😉

Ever fallen in love? How does it feel? Good question: best anwered by all the romantic songs out there, enjoy.

Help yourself and tell the world about you, the captivating world of AMOS calls my name.

like a flood

And its all coming back to me now…

Orkut or chirkut as it is fondly known, can reunite you with people. Sometimes by force with people you’d rather never hear from and sometimes suddenly and surprisingly with people who you didnt remember you needed to hear from. At otehr times suddenly and with thrilling surprise and a few missed heart beats to hear from someone who you have missed in every part of you. The third is yet to happen, till then I can sneak looks at the profile and wait till the storm settles down, compose messages that I never send, funny scraps that remain only scraps of paper.

But back to the other two. They have happened. part I more so than the second. Being someone who hates hurting other people’s feelings …because I am a sensitive soul myself whose feelings have been trodden upon..hey stop laughing at that…sniff..I am sensitive. That thick skin is scar tissue. So someone will message full of enthusiasm etc, and I will reply back with equal enthusiasm and feverent wishes of dont message me again I know not what to say to you except..”aur kya chal raha hai?”

Less frequently I come across old lost friends who I havent thought of for ages but whose memories form an intricate part of my life. And they all come flooding back with an ease and flow that is frightening. one glimpse and I can close my eyes and transport myself back to those school days and feel and see the events as they unfolded. Remember the closeness, the crazyness, the fights, the lights and the time. We bury our memories so deep, after having drifted apart, sometimes with time and sometimes by forced parting of distances and misunderstandings. Why do we even forget those people? And then we look for something we know not, not  knowing it is the old we need.

Maybe time can do some favors, go back, distance too, become lesser than these interminable miles so that words can be taken back and lean out to touch and bring those happy times to us again. The smile, the helpless endless giggles, the long conversations, pigtails and friendships  that declared freinds forever.

Like a flood they come, the memories, unstoppable, undammable and unbidden.