I watched the movie “rock on”. It kinda is your average coming of age sort of movie. Farhan Akhtar is kinda one of those I might have something to talk about type of guys. Ever noticed that his movie has complex freindships, that split people apart and then bring them together..is that what he sells? The desire that we have for our past and what it makes us what we are today. Friends we talk to now and friends we no longer are in touch with. People we wouldnt call friends anymore, yet they touch our lives in ways innumerable, such as ringing of alarms in your head when the doorbell rings or the door slams. Friends whose face you see in other people’s faces and connections you long for again. Its the relationships we have and had that define us.
In so many ways we long to be like our friends, we want what they have, even though we may never admit it, even to ourselves. We may not covet their car or their looks or their boyfriends, but we usually want a part of something they are, which is why we become friends in the first place. From one friend of mine, I want her patience and strength, from another I want the optimism and utter childlike faith in things, from another the ability to beat the shit out of social networking and make it their own, making the introducer(me) a mere watcher, amusedly watching the hurricane set in motion. From another I want the utter belief in their ability and ofcourse non procrastination. That would really help.
The movie made me think of random people I barely ever think about from college, the cool rockers, with their cool hair and beyond cool parties, in which i was the hanger on, the weirdo who actually fell asleep at a crazy party in Goa…yeh yeh I did that. It also made me think ..so many choices we make, diverging paths we choose, yet with each friend we leave behind, we leave a certain vestige of ourselves, a me that only existed then. Like a crazy, super insecure me in school, a very emotional love struck me in college, a rollicking, rich kid in college 2 and a mostly sane bitch in college 3..too much college me thinks. There are some people who would recognize me in all the guises, yet to others that part of my life is strange, i dont think any of my students can imagine me as the excuse making, never did homework types. Or my current friends as the short haired, intense person i was in college. As we grow, we want to shed certain parts of us, leave them behind and move on, relieved to step out of that mold, eager to make a new impression, not realizing come what may, we remain the same, the way we think about people, still remains the same, the way we expect things without having to state them, remians the same and most of all, the passion and emotion, maybe better disguised now, remains the same.